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strangely amusing life
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One of the most popular gender stereotypes is that women ask for directions while men would rather be lost than ask for help. In your personal experience, does this stereotype hold true?
Well my answer is more no than yes, but it is somewhere in between. I believe this stereotype implies more that men are more prideful and competitive than women(theres a thought process behind that but it should be easy enought to see), which doesn't necessarily hold true, Valerie is a great example of such. However, I do believe that the male androgens do inherently cause them to be more boastful and unwilling to accept they have made a mistake. I don't think this should be confused with responsibilty however, because i believe responsibilty is independent of gender. 
11th-Nov-2008 11:25 pm - ahhhh
i'm so horny!!!!!

gahhhhh shes tooooo hottttt
11th-Nov-2008 10:48 pm - i gots a question
has anyone had shoulder surgery?
and besides that good day i just really dont like this idea of surgery.
It's the anniversary of the Russian Revolution, marking the Marxist overthrow of the Russian government. Karl Marx once wrote that "religion is the opium of the people." What is the new opium of the people?
Imma wrap this up: telecommunications. If it had not been for this thing that allows us to access information at a pace never before attainable then we would not have the celebrity craze, the ridiculous chat sessions, sex addicts, and blogs such as this. Hence why we call this era the information age. Actually it goes beyond telecommunications into just simple electronic media, like ipods, video games, and CAD designs. Why? Because it dissociates us, it allows us a privacy and escape from reality, a chance to disconnect from whats going on around us, and at the same time be able to reach into a realm previously untouchable: such as sharing opinions with people from other countries, or researching any field you can possibly think of. So, in a sense it allows us more freedom and appeared control, yet, ironically, hooking us to it: meaning we become dependent on it for gratification, same as opium...

To compare it to religion -which still has a very significant effect, generally to more "needy" people (...that is not to say that i have a disregard for it, in fact, I too enjoy the idealism of faith occasionally)- it has a way of coping with reality. Religion copes with reality by providing a supernatural that "guides" people through the "harshness" of life and provides a reward for putting up with lifes difficulties. So does these forms of electronic media, except it is more immediate and practical, but definately not having as much "class". Is it wrong to pursue the easy gratification? I don't think so, neither do I believe that it is a waste of time to pursue piety. I think as long as you do not let it control you then its a healthy way of dealing with things, because I believe its necessary for humans to enter the immagination which is part of what makes us human.
6th-Nov-2008 09:11 am - gahhhh
love, lust, attached, stressed, sore, frustrated, sick, tired, lonely, and overall confused, but happy :]

i love life, but lifes just not lovin me.
29th-Oct-2008 06:20 pm - i been thinking
ironically it was when i thought i was only trying help Valerie that i revealed something about myself. Yeah, something similar happened to me, the girl i loved decided that things wouldn't work out. I didnt wanna lose her, i felt i needed her. In the end, I guess i sorta found a way of keeping her in my life, perhaps because i lacked strength in character... see i would told myself to forget about her and just move on. I didn't. And having her around me was nice but having her around all the time reminding me that i couldnt have her, and how perfect she was and how she was meeting other guys that did better than i did, and all it did was torture me with frustration, dependence, and self pity. I honestly became desperate for an escape. And I found Taylor. But all i was doing was hiding. Ironically I hid myself  in a ditch, that was kind of easy to see but hard to get out of. And the worse thing is, I kept telling myself i wasnt hiding from my feelings that i do love Taylor now instead of Valerie, but then i look at her, and her pretty smile can break down the wall that I hide beneath and I know I reveal my true feelings. It took me a while to see but the greater truth is i still do love her, and its not right to give up or hide from your emotions you gotta face it somehow. i love her, and haha even though she loves someone else, i'm not going to continue living a lie... its not pathetic, i just realized, admitting that i love her isnt a weakness but an integrity of character. And besides it's fitting for a strong character to have strong feelings.

im still confused. in fact im so confused im confused what im confused about, and thats confusing. i left my sanity with her lol
27th-Oct-2008 04:19 pm - gahhh
I miss you
22nd-Oct-2008 09:39 am(no subject)
Valerie's myspace comment actually made me very happy :] put a big smile on my face... and i noticed something, i am so much more happy to see "love you" from her than when i hear it from Taylor. In fact sometimes when i hear Taylor say it im actually sometimes have to try to remember to say it, its annoying, It became meaningless with her, but she gets upset if i dont say it...

Shes so protective it bugs me, we're not going out, and i keep reminding her that i am going to meet other girls and she says she understands and says she doesnt want a commitment also she wants to see other guys. Yet if she finds out about one of the girls, whether i tell her or not, she gets really upset and says something like "you dont care about me" and says that she's doesnt want me to meet them ever again...

But otherwise shes continuing to impress me, shes working out more, studying more, and she found something she really enjoys: ceramics, shes getting a job over summer at a ceramics store. Im proud of her, but then I'm reminded about her genes. Her whole family is obese, only one is just overweight lol, her mother has OCD, her dad's an alcoholic, she has bad ADHD already, which is already causing problems with me and her sometimes.

I only benched 255 today :[

I miss Valerie so much...
16th-Oct-2008 10:52 am - so
i think i might actually need adderall lol, i took one just to see how it would work, and after an hour i didnt feel anything, and the person that gave it to me said she felt it, i didnt. I just felt a little more awake, more like as if i drank a coffee or something but it just lasted for about 4 or 5 hours. It was great when i worked  on something and i got it all done in an hour, i thought it would take 2 or 3 which is the whole reason i took the adderall in the first place, because i thought i would need to focus for a long time, but i didnt know it would cut the work time in half. hmmm
15th-Oct-2008 09:06 am - relating to my last post
so just to talk some more about the weekend, i really wanted to make Taylor's birthday special, so i got to her house at around 2, and i waited outside with her with a few roses, some chocolates, a hard drawn and written card and a cd with all the songs that remind me of her. We went inside and listened to the cd for a bit and read the card, and she just started crying, she had gone through alot with her family lately and i guess she was just happy to see someone cared, and i honestly think that was the most meaningful part of the day. It was just the happiest moment for her to embrace me crying cuz she was so happy and kissing her on the forehead. But i had another surprise, i used to have an easel in my house back when i painted alot and i know shes really big on art. I asked my dad if anyone plans on using it, and he said he doubted it, so i blindfolded her and set it up outside, and i presented it to her. She pretty much tackled me.  I decided that we needed to chill out so we went to anatolia to smoke some hookah. It was nice and chill i remember, she talked about her friends and what was going on there, and we talked about our goals and fitness. We went to the mall after that, where we accidentally bumped into Mike, and we bought a corset haha its a cute pink one and she looks real cute in it :] we went back home where she got ready for dinner and we just celebrated with her family and had some alone time in her room. Dinner was actually not so great, and i guess i was partly to blame because the same waiter was there that we annoyed as last time, but still it seemed as if there wasnt that much real conversation, i hardly remember what we talked about, so it was kinda dissapointing. So to fix that i took her to the brookfield golf course to the darkest part and just looked up at the sky mostly waiting for the big surprise. At 9 we got back and i took her inside, and she totally wasnt expecting it and outta no where come all her friends and wish her happy birthday, and we had a sweet seventeen surprise party lol. I stayed till after everyone left, and had some birthday fun :] good end to the day.

then monday was pretty hilarious, i decided i wanted to hang out with bret, so at first we went to all the hookah places and figured out all of them were closed so even though i wasnt supposed to spend anymore money i was furious and decided to buy my own, and its excellent. Went to startbucks with him and smoked hookah and drank some coffee, then we got some food at BK, where we decided to go rolling and got some of our friend to join but they couldnt come till 12, so bret and i were wondering what to do, so we decided we'd go to hembree park and smoke, and so we did, of course after about 30 minutes we got seriously bored and bret suggested we make a fire and i thought it was a great idea... so it takes us a while to make a decent fire, and a car drives by and we figured nothing of it, but then we heard sirens, and we ran onto a trail behind us and waited for a while, we heard more sirens and a fire truck and we didnt think that was coincidence but we wanted to go check and guess what? there were three cop cars and a firetruck next to brets car, on top of that there were flash,ights down the trail so we went back down the trail into the woods and kept running till we reached brets house, where we got picked up and brought to my house where we waited for a bit and came up with an alibi and drove back with my car but luckily there werent any cops, by then it was 12 and we met up with our friends bought 144 rolls of toilet paper, and spent an hour rolling this one girls house... it was bad.


and yeah i am putting on weight and i need to work on it.
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